As the title says, My wife and I are trying to get down old school, like it used to be. But No matter what we do we just can't seem to play together. I can see her, send her messages, see her shouts. But I can't invite her and she can't invite me. I just had her logout so she can log back in and MY character information was on HER pc.

Can we not play together on the same network? Is there something we need to do in order to do so?

Thanks

Can you try putting one of you on DMZ on your router and see if that helps?

Try waiting a minute between both of you logging on.

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This is an extremely common problem with people on lan. Dont try and log in at the exact same time, stagger yourselves a little.
When it does happen, just log out and wait 30 seconds to a minute before trying again.

this , 2 connections going at the same time is the issue , log 1 char fully and then the other

This is what we do, otherwise me and my husband have the same issue. Worse case scenario if you tried this and it still doesn't work maybe consider using a VPN on 1 pc. We've not needed to do this however so you should be good.

Curios if anyone has taken a look at potential port traversal issues? As in if both clients are trying to assign the same default port assignment and it doesn't catch that and switch to an alternate port unless another client has already grabbed it.

We don't see it as a problem too often in the PC realm so it often gets overlooked by the end-users, but can be a big thing on consoles. Manual port forwards may not be ideal, but perhaps if the client got along nicely with UPnP it might help mitigate it some? Or perhaps if the port could somehow be configurable within the Ashita config file or something?

Just a couple thoughts....

EDIT: Well... crud. Just spotted where ports are hardcoded into the executable. Guess we just have to leave it up to NAT to manage it after all.